It's All Trew: Vibrating 'critter' frightens rattlesnake-wary cowboy

Old Jake wasn't completely over the hill yet but he was a little long in the tooth. He still rode horseback daily by himself as he and his wife Sally lived way out in the hills working for a big ranch. The kids were gone and the house was empty, but Sally knew Jake would never be satisfied working at any other occupation. She worried about him working alone and purchased a cell phone for him to carry as he rode in case he was ever injured or left afoot out on the range. Now Jake did not understand modern technology nor did he trust anything technical. He called the cell phone "the critter" and refused to take it with him, stating the loud ring would booger his horse and get him bucked off. After 50 years of marriage to Jake, Sally finally worked it out. To ease his mind she put the phone on vibrate instead of ring, but Jake did not understand fully with the explanation going over his head like the prairie breeze. Finally, after long arguments he agreed to carry the critter but "technically" never promised to use it. It looked expensive so in order to prevent loss he pushed it down deep in his front Wranglers pocket. As usual Jake mounted up before sun-up and began his daily ride. The day progressed as he and his mount attended the ranch work Along about mid-afternoon they kicked up a mad rattlesnake in heavy sagebrush...more