SATURDAY NIGHT AT THE WESTERNER

As the antenna turned

By Julie Carter

There are a couple generations still around who remember when life was simple.

You know -- the litany of basics kids today hate to hear us talk about because they have no clue what we are talking about.

One of those things is the TV antenna. You will remember that it never stayed pointed in the right direction to get a clear picture -- if ever you got a clear picture. I grew up thinking it "snowed" on the Ponderosa every Sunday night.

A recent discussion about the things individuals once braved in regards to the television antenna invoked memories of those simpler times.

Urban dwellers learned the fine art of rabbit ear adjustment including additional enhancements such as tin foil strategically placed.

Other adjustments could have included an additional wire run from the "ear" to a window screen or metal window frame. Was tin foil really tin or did we just call it that? And when did it become aluminum?

In rural areas, reception required an exterior antenna and usually the higher off the ground it was, the better the reception.

It often was several hundred miles to the nearest point of origin for the signal that brought one channel and a few favorite shows in black and white.

The common denominator for those antennas of old was the pipe it was mounted to in order to reach such heights and the fact it required regular adjustment by turning to bring it into signal alignment.

As a kid at home, one of four, the drill for us was to climb a ladder, shinny up a roof corner gutter and turn the antenna mounted on the peak of sharply angled tin roof. Someone had to stand at the back door and relay the status of the effort. "That's good!" or "Turn it a little more. No, no, go back a little. You passed it." And I might add we all lived to tell about it and not one of us ever fell off the roof.

In the aforementioned discussion, the use of channel-lock pliers or a pipe wrench for implementing the turn was a common practice. Many made claim to a luxury version of the rooftop set up with the antenna placed in a pipe set in the ground and accessed through a nearby window, avoiding the rooftop climbing adventure.

Inclement weather was a given when it was time to turn the antenna. Wind was the usual culprit to instigate the need but often with the wind came rain, hail, snow and even lightning. All of which put a challenge to the job and a bit of living dangerously.

Then came the really deluxe method of antenna alignment -- the motorized turner that operated from a box on the top of the television. Even that had its own personality with the ever consistent "ker-thunk, pause, ker-thunk, pause, ker-thunk, pause" as the antenna ker-thunked into position.

Today's youth are masters of the remote control that manages hundreds of channels on cable or satellite. Not only do they remain clueless about the character building efforts of antenna management, they have no idea about the curious wonders of the "sign-off."

You remember, the one where, as children, we stared at a screen with a target looking emblem accompanied by a piercing ringing sound and wondered what would happen next.

Yes,Virginia, there was a time when television was not available 24/7.

© Julie Carter 2006