by Julie Carter
Through
the ages and at some point, every man learns the wisdom of not comparing his
wife to his mother. Usually.
In
the world of ranching, that lesson is no different nor is it learned with any less
difficulty or any greater speed. The learning curve is often fractured by the
reverse of the situation --when the cowboy has married a ranch-raised gal that
grew up working right alongside the men of the family.
Not
one ever known for being open to new ideas, especially if they weren’t his own,
a rancher’s times of high stress, worry and life-or-death concern magnify that
situation exponentially.
The
record-setting drought along with the record-setting fire danger has put the
aforementioned emotions in raw form.
Somewhere
along the way, many a Mr. Husband Rancher will get the idea he is the only one
worried, like it’s his job alone. He might exhibit signs of being a little
resentful about that but he also wears it like a coat of arms.
His
wife, whose life’s existence depends on the same source as his, knows the signs
as well as he. She rarely, if ever, gives up the hard-learned lessons of her rural
roots.
Life
changing decisions will need to be made, and soon.
The
discussions that follow vary only in the terms of partnerships that have been
established over the years. However, this crossroads of planning is not the
first time he and she have met at the kitchen table, the corral gate or the
saddle house to discuss methods of doing business or techniques appropriate to
the moment.
And,
the “discussion” (sometimes involving some serious hollering mingled with a
cuss word or two … or nine) is not always over something so serious as cutting
herd numbers, buying high-dollar supplemental feed or maybe just getting out of
the ranching business.
Not
latching a gate as deemed “the way” by Mr. Rancher is a good example of a
situation. It is every bit as inflammatory as deciding if a certain old
sweetheart of a cow should be given the grace to die of old age at the ranch or
take a ride to the sale barn.
The
wife’s get-even for either situation will be to hereinafter latch it the
“wrong” way every time just to aggravate him. After all, latched is
latched.
His
thought is always that his idea is born of brilliance and/or experience and
that her only knowledge is “because her daddy did it that way.” If “Daddy”
comes up in the conversation, the process goes south from there.
Should
a fellow rancher make a suggestion about an identical topic, Mr. Husband Rancher
will consider it with some dedicated thought. But if it’s the wife idea, it’s
always a fight.
“And,”
he said, “her hands end up on her hips as she tells me, ‘Well let me tell you
Mr. Rancher, something that you apparently haven’t yet considered...’ And that’s
where the fight begins.”
Of
course, it is also not a good time for him to mention his mother’s cooking.
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