Sunday, August 11, 2019

Lee Pitts: Infamous Vegetarians

I’m getting sick and tired of vegans and vegetarians bragging about all the famous people down through history who were vegetarians for at least part of their lives. I’ll admit it’s a pretty impressive list: Mahatma Ghandi, Albert Einstein, Ben Franklin, Thomas Edison, George Bernard Shaw, Steve Jobs, Paul McCartney, Mark Zuckerberg of Facebook fame, Martina Navaratilova and Leonardo de Vinci. Although there’s some question about Leonardo because he wrote everything down in notebooks including his shopping lists which seem to have always included meat. And he wasn’t afraid to use paints made with chicken eggs, which seems like the only good use for them I can think of.
The tofu-eaters brag less about other famous vegetarians like Mike Tyson, Russell Simmons, Ellen Degeneres, Pamela Boom Boom Anderson, Ozzy Osbourne, Mr. Rogers, Prince, Bill Clinton and somebody called Moby. Another guy who was missing a few corn flakes from his box was John Harvey Kellogg who seemed to live on crackers. He sure seems crackers.
I also found a list of veg heads that included someone called Walter “Killer” Kowalski. I don’t know who “Killer” was but you’d be surprised at how many mass murderers were vegetarians, yet you don’t hear PETA bragging about them.
Two can play at this claim game. Some non-flesh-eating barbarian vegetarians included Genghis Kahn who killed 1,780,000 people in just one hour. Pol Pot, who murdered two million Cambodians, or one quarter of his fellow countrymen was also an avowed vegan. Some insist that Idi Amin was a vegetarian but I was unable to confirm or deny this. The same is true of Joseph Stalin who mostly ate walnuts, garlic, plums and pomegranates. He also drank copious amounts of wine. I know I’d need something to dull the guilt I’d feel if I murdered as many people as Stalin did.
There is no question about Charles Manson being a confirmed vegetarian and he is also very vocal about animal rights. I guess it’s okay to kill people but you better not be killing any puppy dogs! One of Manson’s murdering female followers was Squeaky Fromme, also a vegetarian. A more recent vegan gone mad was Adam Lanza, the nut job who killed 20 innocent kids in 2012 at Sandy Hook Elementary school in Newton, Connecticut.

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