“Hey buddy, maybe you’ll rope better after your horse foals. Ha ha!”
“Thanks,
pal. I had a horse like yours once. But his brain was so small his head
caved in and he bit his own ears off! Look it’s starting in yours… see
that indention.”
The quick retort.
That clever comeback, the snappy rejoinder that puts the annoying smart
mouth in his place. The French call it Esprit d’Escalier – the wit of
the stairway. In my case it would be better called Esprit d’ Much Later.
I don’t think of what I wished I’d said till I’m tossing and turning at
two o’clock in the morning.
My
normal response to the roping chide would have been more like, “Huh?
Oh. It’s a gelding. Yeah, I guess you know, I get it. Ha, ha. Duh!”
The trick is to let the tormentor step into his own trap:
“My gosh, Bill, if I had a bull that threw calves like that I’d sell’im as quick as I could!”
“You had… you did. I bought him at yer yearlin’ sale two years ago!”
“This is ridiculous havin’ to nearly undress to get through airport security.”
“I’ve never heard anyone say that who’s been hijacked.”
“I’ve been tryin’ to call you for three weeks to tell you about this great networking investment
opportunity. How do you expect people to get a hold of you if you have an unlisted phone number?”
(A visual Esprit d’Escalier… the raised eyebrows)
“How can you live without a computer?”
“Somebody’s gotta think up all that stuff you read on that little screen.”
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