Modern medicine and the cowboy
By Julie Carter
I told you no one would believe it, many didn't and wrote to tell me about it.
In
response to my story about the blind yearling calf loading up in the
trailer on his own, one doubter wrote that he suspected the influence of
Crown Royal or at the very minimum, an anesthesia overdose
not-yet-worn-off the cowboy sporting the $27,000 shoulder surgery.
He
called that the second lie. "Greg wouldn't spend $27,000 on shoulder
surgery," he said. "He won't spend that on a truck. If you don't believe
me, ask him about "old red."
I responded by explaining to him
that I trusted his assessment of his close friends but that the Crown
Royal was very likely only available for medicinal purposes for those
with refined taste preferring it over pain meds.
I also
explained to this occasional ranch visitor that cowboys are sometimes
the biggest babies-too tough to take the doc's advice or medication but
world class at moaning and groaning for the 90-mile-drive back to the
ranch. It's not unusual for the Mrs. to grab the pain pill bottle saying
"Give me those blasted pills! One of us needs to feel better."
As
for the $27,000 shoulder, most cowboys will sell their soul to get a
body part fixed so they can go back out and do whatever it was they did
to hurt it in the first place.
Another cowboy, on the wise-side
of his fifth decade, had a stout three-year old colt buck him off
resulting in an emergency room visit. This was followed by time spent
with triage nurses, doctors, radiology technicians, family practice
physicians, orthopedic specialists and bona fide physical therapist.
His
wife carried a dictionary around to translate their diagnosis,
prognosis, treatment protocols, medication and device advice. This was
followed by a barrage of bills in the mail box that took a fair amount
of accounting expertise to decipher.
The real problem at hand
was getting to the cure. His actual diagnosis was Type 2
acromioclavicular separation, as in "hurt shoulder." That made logical
sense as that is where he landed. If he had just had the foresight to
find a soft spot to land all this could have, in theory, been avoided.
Each
of the specialists, with a serious direct eye-to-eye gaze, told him to
wear the immobilization device. We call that a splint. They advised he
not lift anything including his arm and it would be six weeks before he
move anything except his lips to moan.
Next came the electric
stimulation to the muscles to facilitate healing and a very dedicated
physical therapist determined to bring healing no matter the pain level.
In a moment's time the cowboy was promoted from complete immobility to
lifting weights over his head.
A series of repetitive moves with
pulleys, weights and other devices ensued, moving the cowboy into a
realm of exercises he couldn't have done before the accident, let alone
while on injured reserve.
The cowboy declared there was nothing
about roping that was as physically hard as what the therapist had him
doing. So he went home from therapy, saddled his good horse and roped a
pen of steers just because he could.
"Hee Haw's" multi-talented
Archie Campbell played many rolls on the 60s-70s variety program, one of
which was the leering doctor giving sage advice to his patients. "If it
hurts when you do that, don't do that."
The jist of all the
medical advice given to the cowboy is exactly what Dr. Archie was
saying. If it hurts, don't do it. If the cowboy had just remembered Hee
Haw, he could have saved a lot of money.
© Julie Carter 2006
Issues of concern to people who live in the west: property rights, water rights, endangered species, livestock grazing, energy production, wilderness and western agriculture. Plus a few items on western history, western literature and the sport of rodeo... Frank DuBois served as the NM Secretary of Agriculture from 1988 to 2003. DuBois is a former legislative assistant to a U.S. Senator, a Deputy Assistant Secretary of Interior, and is the founder of the DuBois Rodeo Scholarship.
4 comments:
I once had a puncture wound between my toes & went to the doctor to get it flushed put & a tetanus shot.
After anesthetizing the outside of my toes, the Doc told she's unable to inject the needle inside the hole & I wouldn't be able to
stand the flushing without it being anesthetized.
Seeing how vets have tackled similar problems at the ranch, I asked her "That's lidocaine in your syringe, isn't it?"
"Yes it is..." she teplied.
"Well, then ...why don't you just squirt it in the hole, and let it soak in topically to anesthetize the tissue?" I suggested.
"Oh that's a great idea !!" She exclaimed as if she was enlightened to a "new medical breakthrough".
Lidocaine numbed the puncture wound quickly & the flushing was pain free.
I explained to her that's an old trick I see vets use on livestock, and she said they're starting to use more veterinary ...like cereal.
And after giving her a free short course in medical science ... I get stuck with a $105 doctor bill.
In my previous comment ...Gmail did it to me again ....interjected the word "cereal" when I typed in "vetrap".
Then there's the old standby ...kerosene.
Twice had cuts that weren't stitchable and Neosporin was making it worse so, like when the horses have an interjected wound, the kerosene healed it quickly with quick skin regrowth.
Just leave open ...Don't bandage.
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